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Honestly... Can't take you anywhere...
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Temperature

“I got this icebox where my heart used to be,
Yeah, I got this icebox where my hear used to be!
Now… I’m so cold. I’m so cold. I’m so cold.
Now… I’m so cold. I’m so cold. I’m so cold.”

Dear Lord,
I know a bunch of us have been saying “Winter is coming,” since 2010, but Lord, we didn’t mean it.
Sincerely,
People who watch Game of Thrones.
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Hi, guys.

Let’s talk about the weather. Talking about the weather has always been a good ice breaker. Perhaps as we discuss the intricacies of atmospheric pressure and such, by the grace of God, things will heat up.
If you were paying attention, a year ago I decided to move house and landed a pretty nifty place. I wrote about it somewhere. The new place was cool and perhaps it was the excitement of living in a new house or the fact that when I moved we were in a drought that made me underestimate just how “cool” the new house was.
I basically live outside.
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I don’t know if any of you are experiencing this, but have you ever let out a breath inside your home and seen steam from your mouth? Have you really? I have and I was perplexed!

I was flabbergasted!

I was confounded!

Then I was exasperated and sufficiently vexed!

 

I’ve been reading the dictionary.

 

I thought global warming was supposed to make things warmer.

 

It’s in the name!

 

This is just like that time I found out that sweetbread is actually meat and sweetmeat is not.

you gotta be kitten me
I need suggestions on what to do to increase the temperature here. My options include:

  1. Get a fireplace
  2. Get a jiko
  3. Get a fever

None of these seems appealing.

Option 4 is “Get a wife”. I’m working on this one. Planning a wedding is hard. It’s the reason I haven’t been writing as much. So if you need somebody to blame, blame her. (Actually, wait a couple of years after I’m married and have had several children and the lovey-dovey stuff fades, then you can tell her something like, “Hey, you! Remember when we could have been getting blog posts from your husband but we didn’t because he was busy pangaing a ruracio or whatever? That’s your fault!” Yeah… That will show her).

 

Hey love. I hope you aren’t reading this piece but if you are, remember that I love you very much.

love you lots

Anyway, the wedding date is fast approaching. The stress of it all… I’m only alive by God’s grace. I understand elopement now in a “the grass is greener on the other side” type of way. Traditions will be the end of us. I can’t wait to have my own family so I can ignore all of them.

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Me, staring down traditions.

Sigh.

Keep warm, people.

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