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Honestly... Can't take you anywhere...
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Hi guys.

Today I’m going to learn you a thing or two. Well, technically, my friend Shad is going to teach you a thing or two. I don’t think you guys should take lessons where the teacher says “I’m going to learn you something“.

Maybe that’s just me.

Anywho, I’ve always wanted to write about technology and stuff to do with everyday gadgetry but I teach these things in class and writing about them felt like teaching. Teaching, while a noble profession, is … I don’t want to say boring but… it’s not always scintillating.

Try using that in a sentence.

As I was saying, Shad’s going to tell you something. A little introductory post to technology. And since I’m a vague person and don’t give clear instructions, he wrote about smartphones, I think.

Let’s give him a warm welcome.

Be nice, guys. I think the last thing he wrote was a Facebook note. That was definitely more than 72 days ago.

The floor is yours, Shad. Don’t embarrass me. And don’t try to make jokes, you’re not funny.


Hello nice people.

I know you are for whatever Mark has been up to. I know …his life is a continuous comedy. Or at least that what I think it is from his posts, (go read them now if you haven’t, GO!

Today, however, why don’t we learn one or two things about tech?

Chances are that you are reading this on your smartphone, the one you bought a military grade case for because you can’t imagine it falling and having that spiderweb crack on the screen. The one you bought a power bank for because FOMO is a big deal for you especially on your TL. The one you got a pink case for (I’m not judging but pink? Seriously?). The one with your 2068 selfies. The one that has a lock or combination of unlocking mechanisms on messages, WhatsApp, Telegram and Messenger. The one you pretend to be busy on just to ignore people (maybe that’s just me). I believe you get the picture now.

Now, if you’re like me, you want a new phone. Not because there’s an issue with your current one but because new phones are so much cooler. Should you happen to be at a level where you can actually get yourself one, here’s what you need to know.

Information that may make you pass one of Mark’s classes

Smartphone a mobile phone that performs many of the functions of a computer, typically having a touchscreen interface, Internet access, and an operating system capable of running downloaded apps. So if whatever you are holding in your hand now has the above characteristics it is a smartphone even if people say it can jumpstart a Vitz.

SIM CARD that small red, green or yellow card you insert to make calls or text. It stands for subscriber identity module or subscriber identification module. It contains unique information that identifies it to a specific mobile network, which allows the subscriber (you) to use the communication features of the device. Without the SIM card inserted and working correctly, some phones cannot make calls, send SMS messages, or connect to mobile internet services (3G, 4G, etc.). You can store some messages and contacts there too though it is limited and has a security mechanism (PIN-(Personal Identification Number)) to protect the data you have stored there form unauthorized access. I hope that was not too complex, you people are smart….smarter even than that phone.

Screen Resolution– you interact with the screen and by all means, it has to look good otherwise you might not like the selfies. It refers to the number of horizontal and vertical pixels on a display screen. A pixel is the smallest unit of a digital image or graphic that can be displayed and represented on a digital display device. Pixels are combined to form a complete image, video, text or any visible thing on a digital display.  Basically, the higher the number of pixels, the clearer and sharper your screen will look. This is a very important metric yes? Keep in mind that higher resolutions draw more juice from your battery. Not to be taken literally because batteries rarely produce juice.

OS Operating System – So you buy a device, to you, it looks like a pretty colored brick that is powered by a battery. This brick is supposed to help you make calls, text, tweet, listen to music, take the 2068 selfies and other things. You are now asking yourself, where is he going with this? Well to help you use the physical components you need a manager that makes sure that all of these are working well to serve you. And that, my people, is the OS. Once the OS is installed you can perform the basic tasks of the smartphone and later you can download and install more applications to add more functionality. For the smartphone market out there are three main types, ANDROID, WINDOWS, IOS. A more recent version of an operating system may mean better performance and access to more features and functionality.

Chipset You interact with your phone and how well it responds to you sometimes determines your mood (That was bad but hey). In posters and sites advertising phones you have probably seen terms such as Exynos, Snapdragon, Kirin A12/A11, and others. These are the chipset (Processors) that power the device.  The responsiveness of your phone is largely determined by the Chipset. Newer versions translate to better performance (faster launching of apps), better graphics processing (the selfies and vids), advanced features, lesser battery drains (battery will last longer) etc. As I am writing these are the best and most powerful chipsets out there including Apple’s A12 Bionic Chip, Snapdragon 845, Kirin 970 and the Exynos 9810. So if you are there shopping for a new smartphone look out for these.

RAM Remember your first smartphone, the one that would hang for 15 minutes when you want to do something, and take forever to launch Candy Crush? No? How old am I? The hanging was probably because of the amount of RAM in the device. When you open an app, its information is stored in the RAM, thus the more RAM you have the more apps that can be opened at once without the phone hanging (Lagging). Devices with upwards of 3GB of RAM are generally fast and responsive. Newer devices have better RAM management so go for a newer device with at least 3GB and you’ll be good to go.

Internal Storage– We are living in a world where people feel the need to take 2068 selfies, 10mb video files are being shared from one WhatsApp group to another (RIP Data Bundles), larger-sized apps and games are being made. Thus, we need more and more storage to store stuff. A 32GB internal storage should be enough for you though there are bigger options of up to 1TB of internal storage on your phone. Large internal storage in phones makes them more expensive and thus you could opt for a lower phone storage and combine it with an SD Card. The only drawback with that is that SD Cards are slower in terms of data transfer rate. Again this is up to you.

Camera One of the important features people consider nowadays when getting a phone is the camera. There is so much that can be said about the camera that I might do a separate post on it if I’m allowed to. Either way, there are many sites and YouTube posts where you can get sample photos from the device you are considering buying e.g. GSM Arena. So if you are going to show people that face, get a device that shows it well.

Battery Capacity Who remembers that Ideos low battery notification?  Mostly during lectures? That battery is what powers up your phone. Now you are thinking the bigger the battery size the more it will last, well yes and no. Battery capacity is an indication of how much power the battery can store and not necessarily how long it will last. Although it is thought that phones with large battery capacities last longer it is not always true. Some phones have been optimized to consume less power and thus they may perform better with a lesser battery capacity. Screen size also is a key determinant of how long a battery will last. Larger screens draw more power. A 3500 mAh battery is enough to push you through a day.

Others, to mention in brief are biometrics (Finger Print Sensors, Face ID, Iris Scanners etc.), fast charging, 3D touch etc.

Congratulations if somehow you have made it till the end of this post.

Mark saw the word count in this thing and freaked all the way out.


Comments: 5
  • grace October 1, 2018 2:03 pm

    Yeeeay Prof Shad..I actually learnt a thing or two

  • Sheila October 1, 2018 4:45 pm

    I almost zoned out in the middle reading all the complicated terms under “chipset” but i made it to the end! And now I know a thing or two that I didn’t previously know..Thanks Shad!

    • Mark October 4, 2018 7:58 am

      Chipsets are just weird. I skipped that part entirely.

  • Rioba October 4, 2018 7:49 am

    I made it to the end. That’s the most important thing ?
    Why was I’m I disappointed there are no pun?

    • Mark October 4, 2018 7:59 am

      I’ll ask him on your behalf

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